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Everything posted by MedicineMan

  1. Fadz lies.....he took the actual photo above....and may have coined the word "Kesseled." Great photo, Fadz!
  2. JadGable before he learned to raise his own arm in victorious manner.
  3. For those of you reading "Unofficial Rules of Wrestling" 1.You only get once pass at celebrating a victory in an overly emotional way, usually when you win a big tournament (like state) for the first time. After that you have to act like you've been there/done that before. Don't be the Roger Federer of wrestling. For those of you who don't know who Roger Federer is, he's arguably the greatest tennis player in history who's won every major tournament a bunch of times. But every time he wins the same tournament again, he flops down on the court, cries, or gets hysterical in some other way like he's a rookie winning the tournament for the first time. 2. You should, as a matter of respect, shake your opponent's coach's hand after the match. The only time you don't have to do this is if your opponent's coach makes a negative remark about you during the match ("He's tired!", "He's doing nothing, ref!" "He's just resting on bottom!", etc). He disrespected you, so there's no need to show him respect by shaking his hand. 3. If you're a nobody (unranked) wrestler who makes it to the state finals against a superior wrestler, don't get overly emotional if you lose. You haven't achieved squat during your wrestling career (which is why you're unranked) and only got to the finals through some fluke. So don't act all angry/devastated when you lose as if you were expected to win. 4. If you're a nobody wrestler, chances are you're going to be spending a lot of time in the consolation bracket. If the #1 or even #2 ranked wrestler gets beat at some point in the tournament and chooses the indignity of joining you and the rest of the yabos in the consolation bracket, don't act all high and mighty and wrestle to defeat him. He's already lowered himself to try to get a meaningless 3rd place. He doesn't need the additional insult of some scrub wrestling hard to defeat him. The rule is you wrestle a solid match but the #1/#2 ranked wrestler gets to win. 5. When a weight class gets called at a tournament and all the wrestlers come down from the bleachers to get their bout sheets, it's the lower ranked wrestler who takes the bout sheet and brings it to the assigned mat for the match. 6. Rules for wrestling against the #1 ranked wrestler/returning champion: *Don't step on to the mat for the match before he does. *You wait until he offers his hand for the handshake before the match starts, never disrespect his higher position by offering your hand first. *You never take the first shot of the match against the #1 guy/returning champion. 7. Your headgear should be relatively clean and presentable. Don't tape it all up, put stickers on it, have it all torn up. It's pretentious and screams that you're trying way too hard to look tough/cool. 8. Tape up visible tattoos. This used to be the sport of kings. Don't denigrate that ideal by your trashy tats. Nobody cares how "meaningful" they are to you or how they make you "unique" (unique like every other jackwagon with tats). 9. Win or lose, go to center mat and get your hand raised or stay there while your opponent gets his hand raised. You don't look extra cool/defiant by running off the mat before your opponent gets his hand raised. 10. If you get screwed over in the finals there are several ways of handling the screw job. The ultimate option is to not show up to the awards ceremony so the 2nd place podium is awkwardly empty, which lets everybody know a screw job took place. The other more discrete option is to show up to the awards ceremony and stand on the 2nd place platform. But when the guy comes around to drape the silver medal around your neck, don't bow down and let him do so. Instead reach out and take the medal from his hand and hold it to the side during the ceremony. This is a subtle way of letting everyone know that you'll take the medal but you don't really accept it. If you want to really go all out, you can stand on the 2nd place platform but refuse to take the medal as he presents it to you. 11. If you win a tournament, don't "invite" the 2nd and 3rd place finishers up to join you on the 1st place podium. It's beyond condescending. You're basically saying to them "You weren't good enough to be up here on your own, but I'll give you permission to join me up here even though you don't really belong here." 12. Keep your headgear on after the match until you're off the mat. Have you noticed that the guy who wins is usually the one who pops his headgear strap off immediately after the final whistle or completely takes off his headgear while the guy who lost usually keeps his on? It's like some act of additional bravado after having won. Oh you say it's "uncomfortable" to keep wearing it? You were just wearing it for the entire match you hypocrite. You can keep it on for a few more seconds until you're off the mat. 13. Don't wear t-shirts advertising what "tough" camp you went to over the summer. Nobody cares or is intimidated that you made it through some "intense" camp. Besides it makes you look foolish if you end up losing to a guy who spent his summer sleeping in until noon and playing video games until dawn. 14. If a guy is wearing those old school tights (leggings) under his singlet then he's either the best wrestler at the tournament or the worst wrestler ever. There's no middle ground when it comes to guys wearing tights under their singlets. 15. If you get bounced early from a tournament it's perfectly ok to get the customary serving of extra large nachos with all the fixings and sit up in the bleachers and enjoy it with a huge satisfying grin as you watch everybody else still wrestling and struggling to make weight for the second day. It's one of the greatest joys of losing. 16. If the ref who's gonna be reffing your match is big fat guy then it's almost a given he's going to act like power hungry prick. If he's sporting the classic fat guy goatee (because fat guys think a goatee makes their double/triple chins less noticeable) then it's assured he's gonna be mega prick. The reason these fatties are colossal pricks is because (1) they're fat and (2) they achieved very little during their wrestling careers and now get a kick out of passive-aggressively projecting their fat frustrations on other wrestlers. The only good thing about having a fat ref is that if you put your opponent on his back these fatties will call a pin faster than they can wolf down an entire pie since it's super uncomfortable for them to be down on the mat on their huge gut for too long. 17. If you opponent is going through an "intimidating" pre-match warm-up (slapping himself all over, blaring angry music from his oversized headphones, doing air sprawls, etc) then you're probably going to beat him fairly easily. The guy's scared and he's trying to hide it by going through this elaborate routine to try to "psyche" you out. The guy you have to worry about is the quiet one who's just standing off to the side of the mat, calmly watching the match going on before you two are up, maybe just nonchalantly bouncing up and down a few times being his entire warm up. 18. Awesome singlet + Brand new state-of-the-art wrestling shoes = mediocre wrestler 19. Your opponent is unusually undersized for your weight class but is highly ranked even though he comes from a no-name school with a non-existent wrestling history? Prepare to be destroyed. 20. You're not listening to a damn word your coach is telling you right before your match if there's a hot stats girl or female trainer nearby. 21. The token chick wrestler on the all-male wrestling team has major issues that you cannot even begin to comprehend. Just let her be. After a few months of trying to prove "she's just as good as any guy", possibly a year if she's really hardcore, she'll get bored and quit. 22. If a wrestler has an injured leg and you see his opponent intentionally avoid shooting in on that leg, don't mistake that for sportsmanship. He's actually hurting the injured leg more by shooting in on the good leg. Why? Because when he gets a single and gets the good leg up in the air he's making the guy balance himself by putting all his weight on the bad leg. Oldest trick in the book to make yourself look like a good sport to the uninformed fans. 23. There are few things more annoying than a loud shrieking middle aged woman cheering during a wrestling match when the rest of the crowd is relatively quiet. "WHOOOOOO!" Alright JOHNNY! WHOOOOO!" 24. It's always disappointing to win a tournament and the medal you get is the exact same design as the medal you got at another tournament a few weeks ago. 25. You made a huge mistake by not taking advantage of the information the announcer said about you to the crowd during your finals appearance at that tournament. While everybody announced that they had a 4.0 GPA, or had signed to wrestle at this or that college, or dedicated this match to their parents, etc...you could have "Been recently nominated for the Nobel Prize and dedicates this match to himself because without him this match wouldn't be taking place right now." 26. How sharp and GQ a coach dresses up to coach his wrestler in the state finals is inversely proportional to how many times he's coached a wrestler in the state finals before. 27. Wrestlers who dye their hair for the state tournament are the watered-down version of tattoo guy. Just like guys with tats, nobody who dyes their hair thinks of it as an original idea on their own. They saw some other shmucks do it and so they decided to copy said shmucks but think they're being original and unique by doing so, much like every guy who gets a tat thinks they're being original and unique. 28. Matside dads are the worse. It's all but guaranteed they've pushed their son to become a wrestler and are living vicariously through him, like most sport's dads do. It's also guaranteed the son hates wrestling even if he's really good at it. Watch any wrestler who has a matside dad and you'll notice he's miserable out there on the mat, even if he's in the process of techpinning his opponent in the state finals. 29. Parents who wear t-shirts and sweaters with encouraging slogans about their son wrestler ("Go Johnny!, "Team Johnny", etc) come in two varieties. Some are plain obnoxious, especially if their son is an awesome wrestler, and they wear those slogans as a way to brag and let everyone know they're the parents of an awesome wrestler. And some are the sweetest, nicest couple you'll ever meet and are being genuinely sincere by wearing those shirts as a way to support a son they love very much. They're the kind of adorable couple who bakes snacks for the entire team and even become friends with their son's opponents and opposing coaches. Likewise, their son is also a respectful person on and off the mat and together they represent the family you wish you had. 30. Muscle shirt guy is harmless. He's just a dude who works out only his glamour muscles (biceps, pecs, abs) for the attention. He's not as strong as he looks. Definitely not even close to being as strong as farmer boy, who although looks soft compared to muscle shirt guy, will toss you around like a ragdoll during a match by using his unbelievable Herculian strength that is achieved only by those who grow up on a farm.
  4. @Doc_Hfuhruhurr Guess I lost that bet. Jimmy Cinnabon probably wouldn’t even acknowledge losing. I’m not paying it though. You didn’t tell me that dual was 3 months ago.
  5. Those mat groupies, and cheerleaders from other teams planting kisses after you win a big match. Used to drive me crazy, I mean, they have no regard for mononucleosis, flu bugs, etc.
  6. ... Ara Abrahamian true antihero character Throws away medal in disgust
  7. I will bet anyone on here any amount of money, that Nebraska wins his dual. Loser must pay to charity of winners choice. Come and get some you losers.
  8. This is a great thread, Fadz. I remember you once started another very good and highly knowledgeable thread on Best Duck unders...so who are your top five in that category?
  9. Back in January, after watching a Nebraska dual and later working out with JB, (no, not @Jasonbryant) helping him with his timing on the heel pick, I stopped and picked up a box of Cinnabons. I'd never tried them before. Yeah, I know they've been around a long time, but I just never bought any before. It was a box of 16 baby frosted cinnamon rolls. They call em Minibons. I set em on the front seat while I drove home, only a hundred miles, 90 minutes of easy Interstate. I planned to try them after supper...but that didn't happen. I kept glancing over at them, the smooth, white frosting and the dark inviting cinnamon...man, I love cinnamon. I ignored my natural resolve and discipline, flipped the box open and popped one in my mouth. Pretty tasty, better than I expected, I thought at first. But it was the after effect that really surprised me; once I finished it my taste buds whined for another, my mouth was watering. Too bad "betcha can't eat just one" is already taken by Lays potato chips. Is that what crack cocaine first-timers experience? That powerful craving after the first bump? I told myself no more, but a second later reached for another and popped in into my mouth. By the time I was home, there were only two left, for my wife. I sat there in the driveway looking at them. What the hell, I stuffed em both in my mouth and dropped the empty box in the garbage can before going in the house. My wife was making dinner in the kitchen, but I sidled to the bathroom first to wash the traces of frosting out of my mustache before kissing her. She mentioned that her car insurance was due, and reminded me that I had promised to take care of it. So I got onto my laptop and was about to log into the Insurance website, but my cursor slid up to the email icon, like a possessed Ouija board thingy, anything to avoid making a payment. Most of the emails were reminders to pay bills: cable, phone, electricity, loan payment....geeze, I thought, I'd better get this crap taken care of. But instead the cursor went to maps and I began to look for Cinnabon locations in town. There were several locations, and one not too far...I probably drove by it a thousand times and never noticed. The wife yelled "supper" so I closed the laptop and headed for the table. But after supper I snuck out and drove to that Cinnabon, and bought another box of 16 minibons. I ate em in the garage and then lied to my wife about what I was doing out there...told her I was making her a gift, so stay in the house. In the following weeks, all I could think about was Cinnabons. I was addicted to the rolls. And at work I borrowed cash from just about everyone, spent all of it on Cinnabons, but have paid none of it back. My wife's car insurance was cancelled because I forgot to pay it. I put on 25 lbs and JB told me I didn't need to show up any more for our workouts every two weeks. I owe him like 3 C-notes. I need help...is there some kind of therapy out there for this? And the weird thing is, nobody is ignoring me or giving me the cold shoulder for being such a dick...well, besides JB. Everytime I start a conversation they jump right in and respond, like they forgot I owe everyone money. I'm a worthless bastard, and I can't figure out why they are not boycotting me. BTW, @jross, @Doc_Hfuhruhurr, @jchapman can one of you guys borrow me a fifty, like just until next week?
  10. Could someone please find a schedule of these great replays and post it in advance so we can adjust our schedules to watch? I tried....guess I'm not techy enuff
  11. DOWN GOES MARINELLI !! As much due to the oversized knee brace as to Wick's perseverance!
  12. Ice cream cone to the face should be illegal
  13. FIFY On another note, I have come to love the ignore feature. @JasonBryant has been touting it for years, but I've never put it to good use. Great tutorial here: Do this and it automatically cleans and mucks out the horse$hit, like so:
  14. In 1966, a high school sophomore named Siddidi Finch, an adopted Iranian-born foster child from Oak Park, Illinois, whose parents died in a plane crash near Nepal, entered the Tbilisi tournament in Georgia and won... defeating 5-time world champ Ali Aliyev. He was denied the championship' however, when it was discovered he did not meet the minimum age requirement of 18 years. He never wrestled in high school folk style matches and only pursued freestyle. The majority of his training during his teen years occurred in Japan, where he was coached by the father of Yojiro Uetake Obata, and accompanied the elder Uetake on many trips to Tibet to learn yogic mastery of mind-body under the great poet-saint Lama Milaraspa. The elder Uetake when asked about the wrestling skills of the teenage Finch, stated: "Siddidi has taught my son, Yojiro, many skills." He did however, after graduating high school, walk on at Portland State university, where he twice defeated Rick Sanders in wrestle offs, but was denied a starting spot in the line up because of "academic performance"... The truth is, Finch rarely attended classes, other than to take exams, and in fact his GPA was a 4.0, but the University staff frowned on his absences from the classroom. After the debacle at Portland State, Finch decided not to pursue a wrestling career, instead choosing to play the French horn or golf or something. What if.... Imagine how great he would have been. Below is the only known photo of Finch, sparring with Yojo, taken by his father:
  15. It’s all good, J, and it’s your play, so do it your way. Good chops, brother. Nice gifs
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