russling 14 Report post Posted April 10, 2018 I hearing 3 party that this is coming from another upset parent. http://highschoolsports.nj.com/wrestling/ Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
superbowlhomeboy 235 Report post Posted April 10, 2018 (edited) Sounds like a family didn't get what they wanted and this is their retaliation. All of the allegations appear to be pretty big reaches. Edited April 10, 2018 by superbowlhomeboy Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Billyhoyle 1,295 Report post Posted April 10, 2018 Sounds like a family didn't get what they wanted and this is their retaliation. All of the allegations appear to be pretty big reaches. How can you say this without knowing the facts of the case? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MadMardigain 810 Report post Posted April 10, 2018 (edited) From the article the biggest red flag that could get someone in trouble are a few of the allegations against the assistant. Not saying it’s true but if some of it can be substantiated some of that is likely past what would be considered regular coaching related stuff. Possibly not jail worthy stuff but grounds for getting fired and making the school look bad if they choose to ignored that part of it. Edited April 10, 2018 by MadMardigain Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
superbowlhomeboy 235 Report post Posted April 10, 2018 (edited) I've got nothing to do with any of the people involved and don't know the coaches from anyone. From the article... "The lawsuit alleges Bergen Catholic head coach Dave Bell "inappropriately undressed with minors and watched wrestlers, including Plaintiff, change in the locker room, which they were completely nude or partially nude." It also claims assistant coach Dominick "Donnie" Spataro "showed pornographic and nude photographs of himself and others on his mobile phone to Plaintiff and other minor wrestlers, including photographs of his own nude body including his depictions of his penis." So let me get this straight, the head coach changed his clothes in the locker room? GASP!!! This happens almost everywhere and is not perverted or weird in any way. What do these parents think happens at gyms? It's a locker room not a classroom. Nothing to see here. "The lawsuit alleges a variety of inappropriate behavior by Bell, including that he stated that the wrestler was "shredded" in an apparent reference to his body and "texted and emailed Plaintiff that he loved him, as well as other highly inappropriate and sexual predatory behavior on a minor child."" Calling someone "shredded" is a compliment and not something that is sexual in any way. Was it accompanied by a wink? I don't get it. The text messages are a joke too. You want coaches to be a mentor and show kids that they care about them and at the same time twist it into sexual predator status. This is why we can't have nice things. My guess is the assistant was showing humorous pictures on his cell phone that contained some crude imagery. Dumb, but not a sexual predator. Again, happens all of the time. This guy should be reprimanded or fired and will hopefully learn from it. Lawsuit? No way. If that's the best they got, nothing happened. Nothing about any of this is sexual in nature. Edited April 10, 2018 by superbowlhomeboy 2 Ching and iGranby reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gowrestle 498 Report post Posted April 10, 2018 I've got nothing to do with any of the people involved and don't know the coaches from anyone. From the article... "The lawsuit alleges Bergen Catholic head coach Dave Bell "inappropriately undressed with minors and watched wrestlers, including Plaintiff, change in the locker room, which they were completely nude or partially nude." It also claims assistant coach Dominick "Donnie" Spataro "showed pornographic and nude photographs of himself and others on his mobile phone to Plaintiff and other minor wrestlers, including photographs of his own nude body including his depictions of his penis." So let me get this straight, the head coach changed his clothes in the locker room? GASP!!! This happens almost everywhere and is not perverted or weird in any way. What do these parents think happens at gyms? It's a locker room not a classroom. Nothing to see here. "The lawsuit alleges a variety of inappropriate behavior by Bell, including that he stated that the wrestler was "shredded" in an apparent reference to his body and "texted and emailed Plaintiff that he loved him, as well as other highly inappropriate and sexual predatory behavior on a minor child."" Calling someone "shredded" is a compliment and not something that is sexual in any way. Was it accompanied by a wink? I don't get it. The text messages are a joke too. You want coaches to be a mentor and show kids that they care about them and at the same time twist it into sexual predator status. This is why we can't have nice things. My guess is the assistant was showing humorous pictures on his cell phone that contained some crude imagery. Dumb, but not a sexual predator. Again, happens all of the time. This guy should be reprimanded or fired and will hopefully learn from it. Lawsuit? No way. If that's the best they got, nothing happened. Nothing about any of this is sexual in nature. Perfect summary. I do think that changing with athletes is not a good idea. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
1032004 177 Report post Posted April 11, 2018 Yeah from the article I don’t see anything legitimate against Bell. The assistant coach probably though. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
superbowlhomeboy 235 Report post Posted April 11, 2018 Perfect summary. I do think that changing with athletes is not a good idea. I agree. Nothing weird about it, but probably have to avoid it to protect yourself. Society has become way too litigious. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BobDole 612 Report post Posted April 11, 2018 Perfect summary. I do think that changing with athletes is not a good idea. Depends on the lockerroom and coaches office situation. I don't know BC's situation, but there could be very real situations where there is no true coaches office for coaches to change into practice attire. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gimpeltf 738 Report post Posted April 11, 2018 And I would think a school could also get in trouble for NOT monitoring a locker room. 1 gowrestle reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RetiredPoster 87 Report post Posted April 11, 2018 Sounds like a bitter parent. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gowrestle 498 Report post Posted April 11, 2018 And I would think a school could also get in trouble for NOT monitoring a locker room. Correct Gimp. But in the current PC climate, this can be tricky. A locker room can be monitored in several ways. But a coach changing with high school athletes should be discouraged. Times have changed. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gimpeltf 738 Report post Posted April 11, 2018 Correct Gimp. But in the current PC climate, this can be tricky. A locker room can be monitored in several ways. But a coach changing with high school athletes should be discouraged. Times have changed. Yup. I was just trying to say this has become a no-win scenario. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BobDole 612 Report post Posted April 11, 2018 Correct Gimp. But in the current PC climate, this can be tricky. A locker room can be monitored in several ways. But a coach changing with high school athletes should be discouraged. Times have changed. There are many questions I would have about that as I can think of many scenarios where a coach could have a good reason to change in the same area. -Is there a readily available coaches office? --Some places have coaches offices, but they have big windows where the kids can see the coaches changing. Some don't even have a dedicated coaches office. -Was this a one time thing or every day? --I could see a coach forgetting his keys or running late and changing in the same area Questions like this can shed some light on this one allegation. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gimpeltf 738 Report post Posted April 11, 2018 Saingas - separate facility near football stadium https://www.bergencatholic.org/page/athletics/facilities NJ usually runs a Fargo training day there. Good sized room with a storage room to the end where kids often change. I don't know if the in season kids do that also though. I don't think there's an office there. Have only been downstairs once or twice. I think the weight room there and bathrooms (I think both genders- not sure) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gowrestle 498 Report post Posted April 11, 2018 There are many questions I would have about that as I can think of many scenarios where a coach could have a good reason to change in the same area. -Is there a readily available coaches office? --Some places have coaches offices, but they have big windows where the kids can see the coaches changing. Some don't even have a dedicated coaches office. -Was this a one time thing or every day? --I could see a coach forgetting his keys or running late and changing in the same area Questions like this can shed some light on this one allegation. Great questions. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cjc007 340 Report post Posted April 13, 2018 (edited) Perfect summary. I do think that changing with athletes is not a good idea.I went back to work out with the guys about 20 yrs ago and was told not to change in front of the guys and take a private shower. A lot has changed since 1983. Sent from my XT1254 using Tapatalk Edited April 13, 2018 by cjc007 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gowrestle 498 Report post Posted April 13, 2018 Heard that BC is spreading misinformation. They are vilifying the complainant. Kid was a good wrestler and was a probable starter. He was uncomfortable with what he experienced and went to the principal to express his feelings. Kid was dismissed from the team after meeting with the principal. I think this may be more than a disgruntled parent. Also heard that both parents are attorneys. I doubt they would have pursued this if there wasn’t merit. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
superbowlhomeboy 235 Report post Posted April 13, 2018 (edited) Heard that BC is spreading misinformation. They are vilifying the complainant. Kid was a good wrestler and was a probable starter. He was uncomfortable with what he experienced and went to the principal to express his feelings. Kid was dismissed from the team after meeting with the principal. I think this may be more than a disgruntled parent. Also heard that both parents are attorneys. I doubt they would have pursued this if there wasn’t merit. You think the parents being attorneys makes it less likely that they would file a suit? If anything, that makes it significantly more likely and means they know exactly what buttons to try and push, leaving no stone unturned, while incurring no legal fees along the way. They will be smart enough to tip toe around anything that would enable a countersuit to be filed against them. This would explain why many of the claims are seemingly innocent and common situations that they are trying to pervert. The fact that police were never called and there is no criminal investigation continues to be one of the biggest signs that nothing really happened and that this is just someone trying to flex their muscles. By filing a civil suit instead of making false claims to the police or press, I believe they are free of any slander or defamation suits. Edited April 14, 2018 by superbowlhomeboy Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gowrestle 498 Report post Posted April 13, 2018 You think the parents being attorneys makes it less likely that they would file a suit? If anything, that makes it significantly more likely and means they know exactly what buttons to try and push. To me, this just means they will be smart enough to tip toe around anything that would enable a countersuit to be filed against them. This would explain why many of the claims are seemingly innocent and common situations that they are trying to pervert. The fact that police were never called and there is no criminal investigation continues to be one of the biggest signs that nothing really happened and that this is just someone trying to flex their muscles. Good points. Everything is speculation. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
superbowlhomeboy 235 Report post Posted April 13, 2018 Good points. Everything is speculation. Yes. Based on their claims, it just doesn't seem like there is much there. Finding out the parents are attorneys makes even more sense. For what its worth - my wife is an attorney and I am constantly, albeit facetiously, attempting to have her sue those that wrong me. Thankfully she has a conscience. Unfortunately for society, not every attorney does. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spladle 90 Report post Posted April 14, 2018 Did the head coach or admin have knowledge of the asst coach's behavior and fail to act? If that is the case, the school is liable for damages. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gowrestle 498 Report post Posted April 14, 2018 Did the head coach or admin have knowledge of the asst coach's behavior and fail to act? If that is the case, the school is liable for damages. If the asst. coach did as alleged, he should be fired immediately and face criminal charges. Regardless if the school failed to act, the school will be liable. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
simple 60 Report post Posted April 17, 2018 Update: parents are trying to back down from allegations Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
superbowlhomeboy 235 Report post Posted April 18, 2018 Update: parents are trying to back down from allegations It was all just a power play. Still no criminal charges. 2 olddirty and gowrestle reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites