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Top 5 Worst Kind of Wrestling Fans

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1 - The Fan who calls student athletes quitters and weak.  Yeah, you know who you are.  You have a 9-5 job, live paycheck to paycheck, have never won a medal but somehow in your own mind you epitomize success when it comes to wrestling

2 - The Fan who screams "STALL"...We all know.  You could fight through that hand defense any day of the week and fire off shots faster then Doc & the Earp brothers at the OK Corral

3 - Angry Dad - We get it.  You sucked at wrestling

4 - The I always have to reference something CP or Nomad said on FRL Fan

5 -  The Uncle Rico Fan.  If coach would've put you in the lineup you would've won states

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6 - The Protective Mom

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You dare touch my boy again and I'll execute your dog and every last person you love.  The remainder of your brief mortal span will be an orchestra of misery.  Hear my words, manling. I will slit you open and splash around like a child in a muddy puddle. I'll string a fiddle with your guts and make you play Achy Breaky Heart while I dance in your blood.  Listen and you will know my name is MOM when I lay my vengeance upon thee.

Edited by jross

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7. The one upper yorkshireman.

Gable: Nothing like a good glass of gatorade, aye Gessiah?
Hodge: You're right there Obediah.
Cael: Who'd a thought thirty years ago we'd all be sittin' here drinking gatorade?
Bobby: Aye. In them days, we'd a' been glad to have the price of a cup o' coffee.
Gable: A cup ' COLD coffee.
Cael: Without milk or sugar.
Hodge: OR coffee!
Bobby: In a filthy, cracked cup.
Cael: We never used to have a cup. We used to have to drink out of a rolled up newspaper.
Gable: The best WE could manage was to suck on a piece of cloth.
Hodge: But you know, we were happy in those days, though we were poor.
Bobby: Aye. BECAUSE we were poor. My old Dad used to say to me, 'Money doesn't buy you happiness.'
Cael: 'E was right. I was happier then and I had NOTHIN'. We used to live in this tiiiny old house, with greaaaaat big holes in the roof.
Gable: House? You were lucky to have a HOUSE! We used to live in one room, all hundred and twenty-six of us, no furniture. Half the floor was missing; we were all huddled together in one corner for fear of FALLING!
Hodge: You were lucky to have a ROOM! *We* used to have to live in a corridor!
Bobby: Ohhhh we used to DREAM of livin' in a corridor! Woulda' been a palace to us. We used to live in an old water tank on a rubbish tip. We got woken up every morning by having a load of rotting fish dumped all over us! House!? Hmph.
Cael: Well when I say 'house' it was only a hole in the ground covered by a piece of tarp, but it was a house to US.
Gable: We were evicted from *our* hole in the ground; we had to go and live in a lake!
Hodge: You were lucky to have a LAKE! There were a hundred and sixty of us living in a small shoebox in the middle of the road.
Bobby: Cardboard box?
Hodge: Aye.
Bobby: You were lucky. We lived for three months in a brown paper bag in a septic tank. We used to have to get up at six o'clock in the morning, clean the bag, eat a crust of stale bread, go to work down mill for fourteen hours a day week in-week out. When we got home, our Dad would thrash us to sleep with his belt!
Gable: Luxury. We used to have to get out of the lake at three o'clock in the morning, clean the lake, eat a handful of hot gravel, go to work at the mill every day for pennies a month, come home, and Dad would beat us around the head and neck with a broken bottle, if we were LUCKY!
Hodge: Well we had it tough. We used to have to get up out of the shoebox at twelve o'clock at night, and LICK the road clean with our tongues. We had half a handful of freezing cold gravel, worked twenty-four hours a day at the mill for fourpence every six years, and when we got home, our Dad would slice us in two with a bread knife.
Cael: Right. I had to get up in the morning at ten o'clock at night, half an hour before I went to bed, drink a cup of sulphuric acid, work twenty-nine hours a day down mill, and pay mill owner for permission to come to work, and when we got home, our Dad and our mother would kill us, and dance about on our graves singing 'Hallelujah.'
Bobby: But you try and tell the young people today that you did all that before every wrestling practice... and they won't believe ya'.
ALL: Nope, nope..

Edited by jross

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This thread has potential.  Lets help it out.  

331 - The Biased Fan
332 - The Drunk Fan

485 - The TWOOOOO Fan
486 - The Know the Rules Fan

713 - The 'Let me tell you what is going to happen" Fan
714 - The Disgusted Fan

988 - The Dancing In Seat Fan
989 - The Betting Fan
990 - The Stats Fan
991 - The Fan's Fan

Edited by jross

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9 hours ago, jross said:

7. The one upper yorkshireman.

Gable: Nothing like a good glass of gatorade, aye Gessiah?
Hodge: You're right there Obediah.
Cael: Who'd a thought thirty years ago we'd all be sittin' here drinking gatorade?
Bobby: Aye. In them days, we'd a' been glad to have the price of a cup o' coffee.
Gable: A cup ' COLD coffee.
Cael: Without milk or sugar.
Hodge: OR tea!
Bobby: In a filthy, cracked cup.
Cael: We never used to have a cup. We used to have to drink out of a rolled up newspaper.
Gable: The best WE could manage was to suck on a piece of cloth.
Hodge: But you know, we were happy in those days, though we were poor.
Bobby: Aye. BECAUSE we were poor. My old Dad used to say to me, 'Money doesn't buy you happiness.'
Cael: 'E was right. I was happier then and I had NOTHIN'. We used to live in this tiiiny old house, with greaaaaat big holes in the roof.
Gable: House? You were lucky to have a HOUSE! We used to live in one room, all hundred and twenty-six of us, no furniture. Half the floor was missing; we were all huddled together in one corner for fear of FALLING!
Hodge: You were lucky to have a ROOM! *We* used to have to live in a corridor!
Bobby: Ohhhh we used to DREAM of livin' in a corridor! Woulda' been a palace to us. We used to live in an old water tank on a rubbish tip. We got woken up every morning by having a load of rotting fish dumped all over us! House!? Hmph.
Cael: Well when I say 'house' it was only a hole in the ground covered by a piece of tarp, but it was a house to US.
Gable: We were evicted from *our* hole in the ground; we had to go and live in a lake!
Hodge: You were lucky to have a LAKE! There were a hundred and sixty of us living in a small shoebox in the middle of the road.
Bobby: Cardboard box?
Hodge: Aye.
Bobby: You were lucky. We lived for three months in a brown paper bag in a septic tank. We used to have to get up at six o'clock in the morning, clean the bag, eat a crust of stale bread, go to work down mill for fourteen hours a day week in-week out. When we got home, our Dad would thrash us to sleep with his belt!
Gable: Luxury. We used to have to get out of the lake at three o'clock in the morning, clean the lake, eat a handful of hot gravel, go to work at the mill every day for pennies a month, come home, and Dad would beat us around the head and neck with a broken bottle, if we were LUCKY!
Hodge: Well we had it tough. We used to have to get up out of the shoebox at twelve o'clock at night, and LICK the road clean with our tongues. We had half a handful of freezing cold gravel, worked twenty-four hours a day at the mill for fourpence every six years, and when we got home, our Dad would slice us in two with a bread knife.
Cael: Right. I had to get up in the morning at ten o'clock at night, half an hour before I went to bed, (pause for laughter), drink a cup of sulphuric acid, work twenty-nine hours a day down mill, and pay mill owner for permission to come to work, and when we got home, our Dad and our mother would kill us, and dance about on our graves singing 'Hallelujah.'
Bobby: But you try and tell the young people today that you did all that before every wrestling practice... and they won't believe ya'.
ALL: Nope, nope..

This is well thought out, and very entertaining. 
Seems like you have a lot of time on your hands. 

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2 hours ago, southend said:

This is well thought out, and very entertaining. 
Seems like you have a lot of time on your hands. 

I worked 72 hours two weeks ago.  72 hours?  Who would of thought we'd be working more hours remotely from home than during a quarantine than before the pandemic?  Aye.  72 hours?  I worked 76 hours last week and barely saw my family.  76 hours you say?  Nice.  One of my sub-managers changed jobs and there is no backfill.  You were lucky says @southend... I slept 76 minutes in the past month! :)  [ the above is my current reality and I'm using this forum for creative mental breaks - a little community humor would be nice ].

Please enjoy the real sketch and here is script.
 

 

Edited by jross

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The fan who has an opnion about a match and says the opinion out loud in an apparent attempt to get total strangers to look at him and agree. 

Stranger: "That had to be 2. I mean, come on." Looks straight ahead

Me: silence. Look straight ahead.

Stranger: "I mean, he made two swipes. X got robbed." Gives side glance.

Me: silence. Look at the stranger.

Stranger: continues

 

Edited by jackwebster

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May not be in the realm of fans, but wrestling types. Those who lie about their credentials and conveniently forget details about those stats that no human being would forget, unless they’d suffered some type of brain injury.

Example: I’ve been asked to fact-check someone in the business world who put national champion on their bio. I have no record of them in any college division, Fargo, AAU Junior Olympics, AAU Grand Nationals or any other name AA tournament from the mid-1970s

When a contact followed up, they didn’t know the year, other than “I was in high school.”

If you’re a “Junior Olympic Freestyle and Greco-Roman National Champion” on your bio, yet can’t give any other details - you’re fibbing or misrepresenting the title.

This isn’t even getting into the realm of people who lie about their credentials and then try to scam people from that.

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On 4/14/2020 at 10:54 AM, Fletcher said:

I'll take'em all. We need all the fans we can get.

I agree!  We all can be bad fans at some point, especially when it is someone close to you.  The worse fans are people who say they are big fans but, never go to matches, never watch matches, know nothing about local, state, or national wrestlers and so on.  And, even then, I would rather have them than haters....

Edited by teach
spelling

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Regarding the fan complaining about weak and especially weak-willed athletes; I always remember the criticism of JR Richard, one of the best pitchers in the National League during the '70s, who even in that pre-internet era was criticized for "losing the fire" when he complained for an extended period that his arm hurt.  How does a guy who was dominant for nearly a decade suddenly lose his fire?  Then Richard collapsed on the field one day during pre-game workouts; he'd suffered a massive stroke when a blood clot broke loose from the aneurysm in his pitching arm that had been causing the pain.

Moral of the story:  when a guy doesn't look like himself, don't go looking for psychological reasons, check his health.

 

Edited by jdalu75
original content was incorrect

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4 hours ago, JasonBryant said:

May not be in the realm of fans, but wrestling types. Those who lie about their credentials and conveniently forget details about those stats that no human being would forget, unless they’d suffered some type of brain injury.

Example: I’ve been asked to fact-check someone in the business world who put national champion on their bio. I have no record of them in any college division, Fargo, AAU Junior Olympics, AAU Grand Nationals or any other name AA tournament from the mid-1970s

When a contact followed up, they didn’t know the year, other than “I was in high school.”

If you’re a “Junior Olympic Freestyle and Greco-Roman National Champion” on your bio, yet can’t give any other details - you’re fibbing or misrepresenting the title.

This isn’t even getting into the realm of people who lie about their credentials and then try to scam people from that.

"The older I get, the more times I was state champ/ earned All-American status" = the adult version of "my girlfriend is from Canada you wouldn't know her"

I've never understood why people lie about it, especially with this new-fangled internet thing that's been around for 30 years

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Obnoxious ex-wrestlers “the club”yes you,that think us non-wrestlers are pions ,and have no credibility, compared to “the club” at NCAA finals. 
I think I’ve given A few of you a lesson or two, in wrestling knowledge. LOL

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