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bob_meadows_167

The handshake debate

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So, in another thread people brought up the many handshakes that go on specifically the wrestler to opposing coach after every match regardless of tournament or dual. I think wrestlers should shake before and after the match. All coaches and wrestlers should shake after the dual. I don't think each wrestler needs to shake the coaches hand between every dual meet for a variety of reasons. Coaches often have to be getting their next guy ready, managing other wrestlers, keeping tabs in a notebook, or yelling at the ref/scorers tables.

 

Our coach would straight up tell the other coaches during duals "we shake after entire match, no disrespect, its just for time/managment purposes." Most did not mind.

 

In unique tournaments or finals I can see the wrestler shaking the coaches hand...otherwise I think it is an excessive formality.

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Shaking hands with opponent before and after match = good. Shaking hands with opponent's coach after the match = unnecessary and possibly negative. I've never met a coach or wrestler who enjoyed that additional handshake. Generally the only guys who are more than eager to go shake hands are the winners of the match, so you end up with a situation where you have lots of good winners claiming they are showing "good sportsmanship", but nobody is a "good loser" and those guys typically run off the mat with no shake. So basically that handshake is ridiculous and does nothing but give an extra opportunity for shenanigans to occur after a tough match. Shake hands with opponent and get off the mat. I like how Iowa high school actually banned the shake with the coach after the match. In CA everyone does it and it nobody likes it. Just wastes time and always seems needlessly awkward.

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So, in another thread people brought up the many handshakes that go on specifically the wrestler to opposing coach after every match regardless of tournament or dual. I think wrestlers should shake before and after the match. All coaches and wrestlers should shake after the dual. I don't think each wrestler needs to shake the coaches hand between every dual meet for a variety of reasons. Coaches often have to be getting their next guy ready, managing other wrestlers, keeping tabs in a notebook, or yelling at the ref/scorers tables.

 

Our coach would straight up tell the other coaches during duals "we shake after entire match, no disrespect, its just for time/managment purposes." Most did not mind.

 

In unique tournaments or finals I can see the wrestler shaking the coaches hand...otherwise I think it is an excessive formality.

Bob my feelings simply reiterate yours. I feel the exact same way you do on this subject.

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Since this is the college forum – in college, no a handshake isn’t required after each and every match. I do think it is a great idea for younger guys, for sure youth, middle school, and perhaps in high school, but I could see that going either way.

 

 

I’m a lowly middle school coach and we ask our opponents and our wrestlers to shake the other coach’s hand. The shake forces them to compose themselves, stand up, act like a man, and go do the next required thing; I think that alone has great value for a student athlete.

 

As a coach, I see it as my responsibility to encourage and support not only my guys, but our opponents as well; the hand shake is a great time to do that. I always try to find something positive to say to the opponent, especially if he just got his butt kicked; something to lift him up a little and keep him moving forward in the sport. I have been privileged to get to know quite a few kids who have become very important to me (and vice versa I hope) as they matured from wet behind the ears mat-fish, to more mature wrestlers, and good young men.

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Coaches often have to be getting their next guy ready, managing other wrestlers, keeping tabs in a notebook, or yelling at the ref/scorers tables.

 

quote]

Yes, I can see where that 1-4 seconds it takes to shake an opponent wrestler's hand would be WAY to much time spent, especially when the opponent wrestler does the courtesy of walking across the mat to that coach's side....any coach who refused to shake that opponent wrestler's hand should have team points deducted. Good sportsmanship is shown most when a loser shakes a winner's hand, perhaps only losing wrestlers should walk over to shake the winning coaches hand....and losing coaches should have to walk across the mat to shake the winning wrestler's hand. (Picture Tom Brands doing that.)

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Since this is the college forum – in college, no a handshake isn’t required after each and every match. I do think it is a great idea for younger guys, for sure youth, middle school, and perhaps in high school, but I could see that going either way.

 

 

I’m a lowly middle school coach and we ask our opponents and our wrestlers to shake the other coach’s hand. The shake forces them to compose themselves, stand up, act like a man, and go do the next required thing; I think that alone has great value for a student athlete.

As a coach, I see it as my responsibility to encourage and support not only my guys, but our opponents as well; the hand shake is a great time to do that. I always try to find something positive to say to the opponent, especially if he just got his butt kicked; something to lift him up a little and keep him moving forward in the sport. I have been privileged to get to know quite a few kids who have become very important to me (and vice versa I hope) as they matured from wet behind the ears mat-fish, to more mature wrestlers, and good young men.

 

 

I agree with your second point 100 percent. Sport is less about the sport and more about the development that comes from it. Wrestlers struggle with taking a loss and it is important to learn to deal with these trials with composure.

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Shaking hands with opponent before and after match = good. Shaking hands with opponent's coach after the match = unnecessary and possibly negative. I've never met a coach or wrestler who enjoyed that additional handshake.

 

 

I met an opposing school's head coach through the handshake (and brief chat) ritual moments after wrestling one of his best, someone who was years older than me and about to graduate (whereas I was a sophomore in h.s. who nearly beat him moments beforehand despite being 20 pounds underweight). Post-dual-meet handshakes are pretty abrupt and meaningless in comparison to the quality of such an exchange.

 

Anyhow, our team was in a state of disarray, with 3 different head coaches during my 3 years there and nearly every standout graduating in a matter of months. It was time for me to move on, as our latest coach was doing too. Would anyone care to guess whom I called on months later and got a welcome mat treatment from?

 

I transferred to that coach's school and my wrestling career, and professional career performance benefited immensely. We're still good friends, a couple of decades later. :) Title 9 had recently killed the college team he had previously coached successfully (the University of Richmond), which I guess helps explain my ongoing venom nowadays. He deserved to have better pupils than I was, although I did my (perceived) best to let him down as infrequently as possible (and still do).

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Since this is the college forum – in college, no a handshake isn’t required after each and every match. I do think it is a great idea for younger guys, for sure youth, middle school, and perhaps in high school, but I could see that going either way.

 

 

I’m a lowly middle school coach and we ask our opponents and our wrestlers to shake the other coach’s hand. The shake forces them to compose themselves, stand up, act like a man, and go do the next required thing; I think that alone has great value for a student athlete.

As a coach, I see it as my responsibility to encourage and support not only my guys, but our opponents as well; the hand shake is a great time to do that. I always try to find something positive to say to the opponent, especially if he just got his butt kicked; something to lift him up a little and keep him moving forward in the sport. I have been privileged to get to know quite a few kids who have become very important to me (and vice versa I hope) as they matured from wet behind the ears mat-fish, to more mature wrestlers, and good young men.

 

 

I agree with your second point 100 percent. Sport is less about the sport and more about the development that comes from it. Wrestlers struggle with taking a loss and it is important to learn to deal with these trials with composure.

 

I agree, and that second paragraph sums up my take perfectly, and I DO NOT see why that has to end at high school, or with just the wrestlers (read: coaches need to suck it up and be a good sport and lead by example). I like the sportsmanship traditions we have kept in place, it's civilized in what outsiders perceive to be an uncivilized street fight.

 

Next topic: Is a fist bump a handshake? At CA states this year I saw two wrestlers fist bump at the end of the match, I think that's the first time I had seen that.

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I'll bet I'm older than most of you here, and I'm OK with a fist bump as long as it is respectful. Tradition calls for a hand shake, and later in life having a solid hand shake will be important, but I have seen hugs and fist bumps from opponents who respect each other and I'm OK with all of it. I'll bet most ref's will bring them back unless they shake though.

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After a karate or martial arts match, opponents bow to one another. The British Olympic teams are being banned from shaking hands this summer to avoid contagious diseases. BTW, the notorious dealmaker Donald Trump has said he wishes folks would bow instead of shaking hands, to avoid illness. Admittedly in wrestling one may as well shake hands after wrestling for 6 or 7 minutes, but that's not to say that the rest of the team should necessarily have to join in. The handshake emerged as a custom in some societies before folks sufficiently understood how diseases are spread. Food for thought...

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I am glad that so many of you feel the same way I do on this subject. There has long been a misconceived notion that the fire from wanting to win causes a great athlete to be a poor sport. The variety of athletes we see day to day now though disproves this all the time.

A handshake is a sign of respect, and any sign of respect should be allowed to replace it imo, a bow, a hug, or a fist bump. Not only the losers show bad sportsmanship though, and this has gotten worse today because of certain pro athletes and their antics. Every dual or tournament should have a sportsmanship award that can be won by winner/loser/coach.

Says a great deal about a man's composure, and sets an example to young fans.

 

My son lost a match on what he felt was a bad call by a ref, and he ran out of the gym very upset without shaking hands. I went out into the hall and tried to explain that even if it was a bad call, his opponent didn't deserve that disrespect. While I was speaking to him, the coach walked into the conversation and told me it wasn't a big deal, and he liked that kind of passion.

I had to pull the coach aside after the dual and explain to him that I am more concerned with raising a respectful young man than him winning duals, even though they aren't related imo.

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Since this is the college forum – in college, no a handshake isn’t required after each and every match. I do think it is a great idea for younger guys, for sure youth, middle school, and perhaps in high school, but I could see that going either way.

 

College does require a handshake before and after ever match (between opponents).

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Is it okay for a coach to fist bump an opposing athlete? Athletes doing it is one thing but what about a coach?

 

more handshaking in a high school wrestling dual than any other sport.

- during introduction (often with opposing athlete and coach)

- Before match (with opposing athlete)

- After Match (with opposing athlete and coach)

- After dual (with opposing team and opposing coaching staff)

 

Counting the team and coaching staff as 1 each. During a high school dual you shake hands with opposing athlete and coach 7 times. Seems excessive to me.

 

I like what Iowa has done. Oklahoma is known not to shake as well.

 

It is getting to the point where shaking so many hands is equivilent to recieving a red ribbon for taking 10th place during a middle school track event.

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Agree.... too much hand shaking. We do it to apologize for the physical nature of the sport, which is against our "be nice" culture.

 

If football didn't have such publicity promoting it they would hand shake more. I think football players should line up and shake hands before games, at the end of the half, to start the second half, and when the game is over, just so everyone will know that sports teach sportsmanship.

 

It may come to that, considering some of the scadals like bounties on opposing players, etc.

 

My internet stream isn't getting the "Beat the Streets" and I'm bored.

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As far as I'm concerned, shake the opponent's hand before and after the match and then get the hell off the mat. If you want to shake the opposing coach's hand and half the people in the arena then do it after the meet.

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I agree. Too much hand shaking going on. I would say do it either before or after the match. Preferably after for the sportsmanship aspect. I was never a coach hand shaker and I still don't get it. To me that's ridiculous. You shake their hands after the dual anyways. You can still be a good sport without shaking 500 people's hands wrestling a dual.

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Since this is the college forum – in college, no a handshake isn’t required after each and every match. I do think it is a great idea for younger guys, for sure youth, middle school, and perhaps in high school, but I could see that going either way.

 

 

I’m a lowly middle school coach and we ask our opponents and our wrestlers to shake the other coach’s hand. The shake forces them to compose themselves, stand up, act like a man, and go do the next required thing; I think that alone has great value for a student athlete.

 

As a coach, I see it as my responsibility to encourage and support not only my guys, but our opponents as well; the hand shake is a great time to do that. I always try to find something positive to say to the opponent, especially if he just got his butt kicked; something to lift him up a little and keep him moving forward in the sport. I have been privileged to get to know quite a few kids who have become very important to me (and vice versa I hope) as they matured from wet behind the ears mat-fish, to more mature wrestlers, and good young men.

 

I couldn't agree more. Great post. I'm sure that you were just being humble with writing "I'm a lowly middle school coach", but please know that our middle school coaches are IMO some of the most valuable coaches we have with regards to growing our sport!! The middle school level is of paramount importance b/c it is the foundation for our young wrestlers & ignites the fire that has them transition into the high school ranks. As a former HS assistant Coach/club coach, I always hated looking for very good middle school wrestlers on other programs (and a few of my own) that didn't make the transition to HS wrestling in favor of other sports. Thank you for all you do for our sport & by your post I know you're helping these young men grow more than just on the mat.

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Handshake is only required for the wrestlers at the start of the match...

 

No Hand Shake required to coaches... although I never found it to be a BAD thing.

 

You shake an opponents hand to offer sportsmankship (and possibly wish them luck or a fair match)

you shake the coaches hand afterwards to offer a congratulations and/or appreciation for coaching your opponents to a fair bout (we would hope)....

 

it is time consuming.. and often just 'running through the motions' .. but if genuine... i think good.

You just cant blow a gasket if the Wrestler or Coach doesn't recipricate the handshake (or is unavailable), as they may have other issues going on that require thier attention etc, etc...

 

I NEVER understood why wrestlers (and thier coaches) go and shake the coaches hand(s) upon receiving a forfiet... ??? HUH... thanks coach for giving me a freebee ???? What are you congratulating that coach for... ?? I'm confused.

 

I think the High School federation does NOT require a coaches handshake either... (at least not in NY)

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Handshake is only required for the wrestlers at the start of the match...

 

Conan,

 

College:

Pre-Match: Before starting the match, the referee will direct the contestants to shake hands inthe traditional handshake fashion.

 

 

Post Match: Upon the referee’s return to the mat, the contestants will give a traditional handshake in a sportsmanlike manner and the referee will declare the winner in accordance with the Referee Signals.

High School:

Pre-Match: The first period shall start with the wrestlers in the neutral position. The wrestlers will shake hands and when the referee sounds the whistle, they shall begin wrestling.

End of Match: The wrestlers shall shake hands and the referee shall declare the winner by raising the winning wrestler’s hand.

 

 

Neither the NFHS or NCAA reuire any type of handshakes with coaches at any time.

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